Tuesday, September 04, 2018

Anonymous Asks (3)

“Is feeling same-sex attraction a sin? Is it even a choice?”

This is a highly relevant pair of questions. The Left, which includes most of our media, celebrates and unrelentingly promotes homosexuality. To the first question, most would answer, “Of course not!” This is primarily because they do not believe in sin in the first place, and those who do believe in it insist that intolerance is the worst sin of all. Homosexual attraction doesn’t even rate a mention on their list.

As to the second question, the Left, popular culture and the media offer us no consistent answer. Though many argue for the existence of a “gay gene” (for which solid evidence has yet to be produced but is felt to exist somewhere), others insist that at least for some, sexuality is fluid, and their choice in that area is a basic human right.

Memory-Holing the Inconvenient Data

For example, Megan McArdle, writing for Bloomberg, claims:
“It should not be a dangerous idea to think of sexuality as fluid, as including — for some people, in some circumstances — an element of choice.”
McArdle bases her conclusion on the work of Patrick Egan, a political scientist at NYU, who says that the statistical evidence about sexual identity shows “both life-cycle & cohort effects”. By “life cycle effects”, he means that some people think differently about their own sexuality at different points in their lives: they may identify as straight, bisexual, gay or lesbian at one age, and identify as something else later on. That’s fluidity, which, as McArdle says, implies choice.

That should not be a “dangerous idea”, but some elements on the Left feel it is. Egan’s tweet (scroll down) and its accompanying graph were memory-holed after numerous complaints from people like Andrew Sullivan, who would prefer the public believe “the science is settled”. You can no longer get to Egan’s data from McArdle’s link.

Mainstreaming Fluidity

That doesn’t stop other people on the Left from saying the same thing, including clinical sexologist and therapist Rena McDaniel in Woman’s Health:
“You may, for instance, be attracted to the more feminine side of the gender spectrum, and over time, that may evolve and you may find yourself attracted to ... people on more the masculine side ... and that — over your lifetime — may shift and change.”
So, good luck answering that second question online. You’ll get plenty of propaganda and personal opinions but nothing solid to work with.

Baby, I Was Born This Way

But let’s imagine for the purpose of argument that same-sex attraction is not a choice. Either you were born gay, or something happened early in your life to make you attracted to members of your own sex. Maybe you had too close a relationship with a domineering mother or a distant relationship with a passive father. Maybe you were sexually abused. You didn’t ask for it, but it’s how you feel today, and it seems to be a consistent pattern. The fact that some people say your feelings might change later on is of no comfort to you today, because you have to live with those thwarted, frustrated, confused feelings right now.

That poses a dilemma for the young believer who wants to follow Jesus. Sure, he or she could wander off to one of the ever-increasing number of evangelical churches that welcome homosexuals into their gatherings and resolutely avoid any discussion of the solid scriptural evidence that same-sex relationships are sinful. But I note that the question here is not “Is a same-sex relationship wrong?” but rather “Is feeling same-sex attraction wrong?” So I’m going to assume the person who asked the question already knows perfectly well that same-sex relationships are displeasing to God and has decided not to pursue one. That’s a solid start, but a very lonely place to be in, even among the people of God. I salute those who make such a choice for themselves out of conviction about what scripture teaches. It ain’t easy, and it takes courage.

No Temptation Has Overtaken You …

So what about feelings then? Do I somehow damage my relationship with God every time I find myself drawn toward intimacy with someone of my own sex?

That’s a difficult situation to find oneself in, but I should point out that it is not a problem unique to Christians who believe they are homosexual. Throughout my life, I have repeatedly found myself attracted to women with whom a sexual relationship would be an absolute moral non-starter, and some of those attractions were initially quite electric. This is probably an issue for most men, and many women too: we want someone we can’t have. That’s why adultery happens, and far too frequently these days, among Christians too.

My question to the questioner would be this: what are the circumstances in which you feel the attraction? That makes a huge difference as to whether it is sinful. Temptation itself is not a sin. We know this because the Lord Jesus was tempted by Satan and did not sin. But flirting with temptation is definitely sinful. Indulging it, fantasizing about it, going places where you know full well you will be exposed to it — all these are sinful acts. As Solomon asks in Proverbs, “Can one walk on hot coals and his feet not be scorched?” The answer is no.

Flee Sexual Immorality

The Bible talks repeatedly about temptation and the consistent teaching of scripture is this: Run! “Flee from sexual immorality.” “Flee youthful passions.” “Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.”

There’s a huge difference between, on the one hand, watching a young man or woman you don’t know get up and give her testimony and feeling a sudden, inappropriate surge of sexual desire which you reject in the presence of God, and, on the other hand, feeling a surge of sexual attraction because you have parked at the bottom of a dark lane with someone you know you shouldn’t be alone with. If the first is sinful at all, it is definitely less sinful than the second.

More importantly, while not ideal, the first situation is not flammable. It is not about to turn into anything even more wicked. But the second is like lighting matches in a room full of gasoline.

A Conversation with Satan

Thus the problem is not really the same-sex attraction; the problem is whether you are really committed to not playing around with it. If you make a practice of fighting sexual temptation rather than indulging it, you will find that, like every other sort of temptation in the world, it diminishes over time.

If, on the other hand, like Eve, you decide to stand there having a conversation with Satan about it that can’t be summed up with the words “Be gone,” I don’t like your chances much more than Eve’s.


  1. Science:
    Some years ago one of the US TV networks (could have been Public TV) broadcast an extremely detailed and multipart series concerning the then latest scientific inquiries and conclusions concerning human sexuality to answer the question of homosexuality. Practically all relevant disciplines were represented and contributed like, genetics, psychology, biology, sociology, twin studies (inheritance), and so on. I followed that documentary and was surprised but reaffirmed in my own conclusions when ALL the scientific experts to this study agreed that all detailed findings and conclusions of this study were adequately summarized by a single statement at the end of the last episode. In their professional judgement the statement provided the essence of their findings. The (paraphrased from memory) statement was: We conclude that Nature is not cruel and can at no time force any individual to do what they do not want to do. This scientific conclusion was intended to make it clear that responsibility for sexual behavior and deviancy always rests with the decision made by the individual and not with compulsory circumstances.

    The reason why I bring all this up is because the clarity and correctness of this scientific conclusion is evident even today because it is timeless. It places the responsibility where it belongs, with each individual and their choices and completely invalidates the current arguments trying to blame natural biological coercion instead of free will. The latter is indeed a devious socio-political misdirection to eliminate the stigma that would come with poorly implemented free will. It is succeeding in the current political climate to the point where civil honesty, decency, and free speech can now cost you your livelihood. Unfortunately, this kind of perverse political climate has always existed in societies at one time or another in one form or another.

    What about love? The homosexual has no problem misinterpreting the satisfaction of his/her urges through reciprocity as true love. Direction for true love is of course provided in the Bible and therefore promptly ignored because it would interfere with that satisfaction. True love is when you put the interests and eternal wellbeing of the other person above your own. Instead of attempting homosexual seduction of the young in their hormonal turmoil, the decent person will help them caringly get through personal situations in a supportive manner that is interested in contributing towards safeguarding their soul. Of course, this is impossible and irrelevant if you think of yourself as a soulless being.

    Facts and from Experience:
    Homosexuality would die a natural death if true love as defined above were implemented. It is not however, especially in today's climate. There is a tactic to attempts at homosexual seduction that succeeds often enough to ensure its perpetuity. It usually starts with the homosexual attempting to test the waters when a perceived weakness is detected in the other person. This may consist of first establishing a friendship with the unsuspecting juvenile, or even adult, and then testing by small innocuous advances like congenially offering a drink, placing your hand on the other person's knee (to test reaction), inviting the person to view some interesting pictures, which can happen from who you thought might be a friend, a stranger who sits down next to you on a Central Park bench late at night, your own (happily you thought) married boss who hired you and rescued you from fairly permanent unemployment, and so on. What is upsetting is the fact that the biblical call to true love would resolve the morass and quagmire of sexual deviancy if heeded. But that will not happen and therefore we have the climate and attitude today where the thrust is to get society back to the state of ancient Greece which was at a point where mothers voluntarily relinquished their male children to service the needs of elderly males.

    1. A grim picture, Q, but worth pointing out.