“Let not steadfast
love and faithfulness forsake you; bind them around your neck; write
them on the tablet of your heart.”
“I knew that you are a gracious God and merciful, slow to anger
and abounding in steadfast
love.”
The first quote comes from the book of Proverbs, and we
might paraphrase it this way: “Do not ever allow yourself to stop being
consistently loving and trustworthy; make these qualities part of the fabric of
your being.” As a father, King Solomon is challenging his sons and others who
will eventually read his wise words to be people of exceptional kindness and
consistency.
The second quote here is the prophet Jonah’s complaint to
God, and it pretty much explains itself. But it also serves to illuminate the
first quote a little bit.
Steadfast Love
In Hebrew, the word rendered “steadfast love” in my ESV is checed, and is sometimes translated “mercy”. This sort of love is not just an
emotion, it’s an action. It is affection that expresses itself through kind
acts which are often undeserved, inconvenient, or both at the same time.
So Jacob could say to his son Joseph, “Deal kindly
and truly with me. Do not bury me in Egypt.” In other words, “Joseph, if you
really care for your father, here’s how you can demonstrate that: trek all the way back from Egypt to Canaan and bury my body where it belongs.” This was
the litmus test of Joseph’s devotion to his father, and it required no small
amount of trust on Jacob’s part and no small amount of character on Joseph’s.
Jacob would not be around to remind Joseph or complain if his son did not come
through on his promise. Were Joseph to neglect his father’s solemn request, it
would demonstrate that whatever feelings he had for his dad were only polite sentiments;
they fell short of genuine love and loyalty.
Too Kind for His Own Good
Jonah was annoyed with God because God was too kind, and
especially because God was too kind to people Jonah felt didn’t deserve it. And
he was right. They didn’t.
The first thing Jonah didn’t realize is this: that nobody
deserves the kindness of God, including rebellious prophets. There is not some
arbitrary line in the heart of God extending across the human race this far but
not a foot further. God so loved the world, including not just the Israelites
who acknowledged him as God, but also the violent, immoral citizens of the aggressively-expansive
Assyrian empire who didn’t. This is because steadfast love originates in the
individual doing the loving, not in the objects of his kindness.
The second thing Jonah didn’t realize is that there is no point
in talking about the steadfastness of love if it breaks down at the first sign
of failure on the part of its object. There is no value in emotions which evaporate
the moment their object fails to cooperate with the program or shows insufficient
appreciation for the efforts being made on their behalf. Such sentiments are
pointless and vain. To be steadfast means to keep going in the face of what may
amount to considerable adversity.
When Solomon’s Counsel Matters Most
So then, when Solomon tells us to “Let not steadfast love
and faithfulness forsake you”, his counsel is of greatest value to us not when
the objects of our kindness are compliant, grateful, sweet-tempered,
well-behaved, generous, honest and loyal, but rather when they are insubordinate, thankless,
truculent, iniquitous, penurious, deceitful backstabbers. There is no need to bind love
and faithfulness around your neck or write them on your heart when they well up
in response to exactly what we are hoping for in others. Such affections
produce themselves automatically and require no grace or self-control.
No, it is when we have been most disappointed in, betrayed
by, offended at or angry with a partner, child, friend, neighbor, co-worker or
even — heaven forfend — a fellow Christian, that we need love characterized
by steadfastness and faithfulness. Sentiment packs its bags and heads for the
hills when the going gets tough.
Abounding
God abounds in steadfast love. He doesn’t have to reach down into the depths of his being to kindle it, or to exercise self-discipline in order to stir up his affections. Kindness pours out of him like light and warmth from the sun. It is only when rebellion is entrenched, warnings ignored, and repentance rejected repeatedly, that God with greatest regret must act in judgment instead of mercy. In God’s case, the exercise of will is required to restrain his kindness, not to produce it. He needs no binding and writing, and no reminders to be merciful from human beings. Rather, it takes a sustained outcry from the victims of evil to urge him from his default mode of ceaseless kindness to all.
A practical reminder to human beings, then, whose default mode is fickleness and judgmentalism: loving steadfastly does not require us to feel loving before we act. In a needy world,
a grudging kindness actually performed is preferable to a kindness much-considered but unconsummated. The feelings will come when they come. The actions should characterize us now.
Meanwhile, the Holy Spirit resides in our hearts with the goal of producing the very nature of God himself in us. One day we too will learn to abound in that which comes naturally to God.
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